What Are The Terrible Twos?
If you are already a parent of a toddler or will be, I’m sure you have heard the phrase “terrible twos”. You might even be going through the phase right now and are just at a loss of what to do.
It might be a daily occurrence, or you may seem to have a few good days and think it’s over, then realize you were totally wrong and think you’re back at square one.
Since I’ve been through the terrible twos and are still dealing with it, I’ll give you some insight on my experience on how long it may last, how to handle it, and of course the need to know signs.
Some things during the terrible twos are just plain amusing. Enjoy this funny video and see what I mean.
How Long Do The Terrible Twos Last?
At this point in the game, you probably have of lots of questions. The main one being, how long will this last? I, of course, can’t give you an exact answer and I wish I could, but from my experience, my oldest didn’t go through that stage and I’m thanking the good Lord for that. However, he went through the terrible three’s. Yep! There is that one too. I think that’s why we decided to have another one because he was so easy at that time and was only two and a half when we had our second. Boy, did I get that time made up with my second.
My youngest is currently going through it and has been for a few months now. I have heard of some children starting the terrible two’s before their second birthday and some after. I also have some that had their children start at the age of two and it lasting a few months. I would safely say in my opinion give or take 6 months. You might get lucky like me with my first and not get it at all. Just be aware it might happen, but it doesn’t last forever.
Handling the terrible twos is a tough one because this is a critical stage. They’re exploring and learning what they can and can’t do. Not to mention they know exactly how to push your buttons. You definitely don’t want them to stop learning and this is part of parenting. Yet you want to teach them so they make the right choices later. You’ll find yourself telling them things over and over even after 2 min of telling them the first time. Yes, it gets frustrating for us and for them.
There is no right or wrong way to handle the terrible twos. Some parents may do time out and it works, but may not for you, which is exactly my case. What do I do? Try different things to see how they respond. I’ve done time outs, taken things away and yelling, yet, nothing seems to work. Sound familiar?
I have learned to accept that it is happening and there is nothing I can do to stop it, but when it does, I try my best to let my son know I’m not okay with what he’s doing and redirect him to something that is okay for him to do. I always look him in the eye when I’m disciplining him that way I know he’s paying attention to what I’m saying. He, of course, isn’t going to pay attention if I’m yelling at him from across the room. When my son is throwing a tantrum and I take something away, it’s adding fuel to the fire, however, he needs to understand that there are consequences to his actions. It hurts us more than it hurts them, but they need to know from the beginning what is expected.
Do what works for you, not what has worked for everyone else. You just might find that one thing that makes this phase a little more tolerable. Here is a great resource to find out more about dealing with this phase.
Terrible Two Signs
It is funny looking back at the terrible two signs. I don’t think I realized that’s what my son was going through until I had that moment of, this must be what the terrible two’s are like. I thought it must be me that was just in a bad mood pretty much all the time. I remember mumbling under my breath at times, “what the hell is your problem?” and I find myself thinking that a lot these days. It’s like they’re woman PMSing that woke up on the wrong side of the bed who hasn’t eaten and gets mad at the drop of a hat.
Your child may throw things, bite, kick, hit, scream and throw themselves on the floor all because you put their juice in the orange cup and they wanted the green one. Mine for some reason has this thing where he says, “no no no no”, but in a smart alec way that is basically telling me what’s really going to happen all while shaking his head.
Mine hasn’t really resorted to biting or kicking at all but does try (yes, try) to hit when he’s upset. I get it, he can’t control his emotions and doesn’t have a sense of self yet. I can’t get upset at him for getting upset, he’s human and we all get upset. Just the look alone on my face is enough for him to know he is not supposed to do that. Sometimes it works and sometimes he could care less.
My son’s go to is throwing things. I mean anything and everything that is around. I can literally see his thoughts when he’s mad because he looks around for something to throw. I have to act quick and move things before he sees them. This occurs on a daily basis and has been for a few months. He even throws things just because he has just learned this new skill and hey, it’s fun! Just not at my head.
Little Last Thoughts
Once they start throwing themselves on the floor and screaming over the dumbest things, you know they’re going through the terrible twos. You’ll see the attitude come out and their whole personality change pretty much overnight. Know it’s nothing you’re doing wrong. We are all learning together. Find works for you dealing with this phase. Just know it gets better and you’ll forget all about it down the road. You got this!!
Please leave any comments or questions below. I would love to hear what has or hasn’t worked for you.